how i long to be

the sleeping captain of an unanchored ship

​

(your) body of water, rocky

upon the chest

fracturing cheekbones

stabs after stabs

​

our strangling affair, chafing

ankles never washed onto shore

my milky underbelly

nastier than a bitten wound

​

wretched was the love you gave me,

gagged and bound

tucked behind: the wheel

now yours

​

jaw disconnected, palate stirring

your gummy teeth, caramel cheeks

so sore, so unbearably

infatuated with mine

​

that way, you could finally

swallow me

whole and raw.

​

that night:

from the back of your throat

we watched a meteor shower together

so quickly diminished

the hopeless night that followed

there was no other way

​

trampled grounds of flesh

suddenly there was nothing but

blindness and dampness

digested were

the words

​

i could never say

​

(2020)